The trophies have been awarded and the giant checks cashed, but we’re not done with the Australian Open yet. Today we recognize the worst of the worst in an overall fashion-challenged Slam.
Before we get to the nominees, let’s talk about this outfit, worn by Petra Kvitova:
I’m crazy for this half-zip top, a nice departure from a standard-issue tank. The Nike-sponsored players wore it various ways–zipped up or down, white or black sports bra peeking out. Nicely fitted, this shirt manages to be sporty and refined at the same time.
What a shame that it’s paired with that hideous skirt. As much as I like the skirt’s color–which is what, exactly?–I detest that skinny, puckered hem. Even worse is the puckering from the elastic waistband. I thought we retired that look when we discovered the smoother silhouette afforded by wider waistbands and better fabrics. Frankly, this skirt looks like something I could make. That’s not a compliment.
But puckering alone can’t land someone on the worst-dressed list. For that dishonor, you need just the right top…
Nominee #1: Genie Bouchard
This may well be the most heinous top I’ve ever seen. There is nothing–and I mean nothing–redeeming about this crime against sportswear. The too-high neckline. The oddly long sleeves. The awkwardly cropped hem. The ridiculous knot on the side. A fashion atrocity from start to finish.
Nominee #2: Serena Williams
Another Slam, another “worst dressed” nomination for Serena.
Let’s face it. Serena has a unique body type for a professional tennis player. So I tried to consider this unitard as a piece of clothing only. The fact is, this green getup would look ridiculous on anyone.
I’m not sure what Serena’s trying to accomplish with her fashion choices (French Open cat suit, US Open tutu), but I’m getting tired of including her here.
Nominee #3: Maria Sharapova
Considering the competition, I don’t expect Maria to garner many votes in this poll. To be honest, if any other player wore this dress, I’d barely notice. But Maria is this sport’s fashion icon. We’ve come to expect glitz and glamour from this superstar. When the bar is set so high, this sad, drab dress can only disappoint.
By the way, you can blame Nike for all three of these abominations. Hear that swoosh? That’s Nike’s credibility going down the toilet.
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