This year’s weird but still wonderful US Open is behind us. The only thing left to do is award the prize for most fashion-challenged. Let’s get right to it!
Nominee #1: Naomi Osaka
Yes, I know, you love Naomi. Hey, I love her, too. But does that mean we have to love her outfit? Does that mean we have to spare her the ignominy of a worst-dressed nomination? No. The Fashion Face-off must maintain its credibility as an impartial arbiter of tennis style.
It’s not even the color-block unitard that bothers me. Instead, I’m perplexed by the complete randomness of the shorts. These two items of clothing aren’t communicating with each other in any respect—style, fabric, color, cut, fit. Not a hint of coherence here.
Still, it was nice to see Osaka raise her third major trophy. And I’m seriously loving her hair.
Nominee #2: Victoria Azarenka
Osaka’s opponent in the US Open final took the opposite approach. Azarenka’s top and shorts cohere to the point of being indistinguishable.
I don’t generally like rigid fashion rules, but I’m going to propose a limit of one screaming neon item of clothing per outfit. Rather than pile on even more pink, why not complement that shirt with a pair of shorts in a coordinating color? Or how about plain old white? Yeah, I know I said white is boring, but sometimes your poor, beleaguered eyeballs need a rest. Boring can be a virtue.
I kind of like her hair, though. It’s edgy and free-spirited and seems to suit the new Azarenka.
Nominee #3: Harry Connick, Jr.
Just because you’re not a tennis player doesn’t mean you get a pass from the Fashion Face-off.
I like a comfy Henley as much as the next guy. It’s the perfect style for so many occasions. Walking in the woods on a crisp fall day. Apple picking. Blogging by the fire.
But when you’re performing “America the Beautiful” in the world’s largest tennis stadium, you might want to up your game.
Maybe the empty stands confused him. (Note to Harry: Just because no one’s in the seats doesn’t mean no one can see you.)
There you have it—the three worst-dressed people in Ashe Stadium. But who gets to go home with the prize????
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